#31DaysOfHorror: Oct 10

Slumberpartymassacre2

The words “Mindless Cash-In” spring to mind whenever i see this film. The original was a cult classic (Roger Corman has a knack for churning those out), with smart themes of female empowerment meshed into a script that was intended to be a parody of slasher films. When the sequel came about, all intelligence as well as logic was dropped from the project, and instead a Hokey Rock-n-Roll subplot was added. On paper, this idea reeks. In practice…It’s still pretty rotten, but at least it’s entertaining. A low-rent, shapeless, ugly movie that wears stylistic flourishes like a warthog in a bonnet, Slumber Party Massacre II is a Nightmare on Elm Street knockoff that makes up for in sheer weirdness what it lacks in coherence, suspense, and production value. Plus, any movie featuring a candy-assed rockabilly dream-killer with a guitar drill is certainly worth seeing at least once.

slumber2

After the events of the first film, Courtney is the only survivor who is still sane. You remember Courtney, the idiotic young attention whore who spent most of the film being a pain in the ass of her hot older sister Valerie, or whacking off to Sylvester Stallone. Now played by Crystal Bernard, Courtney takes center-stage as a VOCID (Victim of Crime Involving Drills) teen just trying to meet boys, get tan, and play in her girl-rock band. Pretty basic, right? Well, not for long: it seems that Courtney is plagued by memories of the massacre that are interrupting her beauty sleep and generally putting her on edge. Well, that’s not entirely true – as she wasn’t actually present for most of the murders in the first film (she hangs out at home wanking to Playgirl for most of the movie), she’s technically plagued by memories of the first movie, which she likely watched half-heartedly in preparation for this role. So we see her having flashbacks to things she never saw in the first place, mixed in with images of a leering loony (Atanas Ilich) in some sort of smoke-machined netherworld (cue Nightmare on Elm Street references). Her well-meaning but wet-blanket mother  is simultaneously smothering and completely emotionally inaccessible (cue more NOES references), doing little to improve the situation. But Courtney does glean some genuine satisfaction from playing in a wretched rock band with her friends Sally (Heidi Kozak of Friday the 13th pt 7, as the ditz), Sheila (Juliette Cummins Friday 5, as the rich sex-fiend) and Amy (Kimberly McArthur, Playboy’s Miss January, 1982, as… the good girl, oddly). The chicks like to hang out in the garage, drink Slice, and play their horrible brand of pop-drivel for guys who only praise the display in hopes of getting laid. . When Sheila’s dad buys a new condo on a golf course (in theory – it looks like the middle of the desert to me), the girls plan a secret slumber party in the empty place so they can cut loose and rehearse. As you can no doubt guess, shit doesn’t go as planned. Courtney is plagued by visions and waking nightmares of the stupidest killer ever depicted in a slasher film, somehow swapping out the creepy Russ Thorn for a singing, dancing, satanic drill guitar playing asshat. The idiocy is further exacerbated by the arrival of the truly idiotic (in a “why are you alive” kind of way) boyfriends.   

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Its never made clear what the actual fuck is happening, whether this is all Courtneys dream or if its all a psychotic hallucination. If I’m being honest i don’t really think either scenario would make the film better or worse. I feel like we’ve kinda already gone past the point of no return with that one. If i were to try and list the redeeming qualities of this film, Im pretty sure I’d forget what I was doing, watch another movie and probly have a better time. The only reason to watch this film is if you are a glutton for punishment, like 80s sleaze and cheese fests, and don’t take ANYTHING seriously…so I figure about 50% of my readers.

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